My friend Johavarin, or as my hero Alakath call him,
Johan, has taught me language of the domicii. I do not know what the
word for them is in this language. Johavarin says they have a word for us.
Feral they call us. I know this word and its meaning. It is not nice. But I am
sure our word for them is as bad to them, should they learn it.
My other friend, Amaka, I worry for. She go missing and
now is with a rovali coopata. Johavarin says the words for this is
revolutionary sect. They are people with a different set of belief than those
in power. While our clan did not have this problem, in clan that do, they are
killed by fire when the kruum defeat them. Johavarin says that the domicii
rovalii would be hang with rope should they fail.
So now I write my history. My epiccia, as it is in
my words. As Alakath say, my story. I do not know why we ferii luuvatii
do not do this, but maybe, when I go to rebirth my clan, I teach my people to
do this. When I am no longer Tabira Skaalliit Kolvlein, but Kraam
Skaalliit Kolvlein.
Now I begin my epiccia.
I was born twenty two winters ago. My parents were Kruum
Kolvlein and a candisha. Kraam Kolvlein was said to be angry at
him for it, and she took out that anger on me. As much as I try to please her,
I cannot remember a day she did not beat me. She say she had reason each time,
but my siblings did the same as I and were not beaten. Only I was beat, usually
with a leather lash that she also used as weapon in war.
This go on for a few winters. After my fifth winter, Kraam
Kolvlein beat me worse than normal one day. To avoid her wrath any more, I ran
into woods around camp. There was a plant where I ran to I use to help the
tears in my skin heal. I would take the leaves, cover my tears with them, and
lay for a few hours. It was normal I would sleep from crying.
I wake up from sleep on this day and return to camp. I
find all huts burning and everyone dead. When I find father and Kraam
Kolvlein, I fall onto knees and cry loudly. The Bruumweild hear me and
take me to their camp. This is how I become tabira.
My captors began humiliating me the moment they found me.
The moment before they capture me was last time I wore clothes until Alakath
gave me dress. As soon as bad ferii find me, they rip off all clothes
and wrap me with rope. They were sure to have it tight between my legs, to where
it was uncomfortable.
They put collar around my neck and tied a rope to it. With
this, they drag me to their camp. Even when my legs collapse from being tired,
they continue to drag me. I got cut and torn severely by this. But they did not
allow me to care for injuries.
They immediately put me to work. They made me wash and
clean chelatai and candishai. Sometimes, they make me use my
mouth to clean them, binding my hands behind my back. Sometimes, while I clean
these people, men would come by and ejaculate onto me, as if I were candisha.
But I had not seen enough winters to be candisha.
Early on, I try to complain. I was punished for this by
beatings and having things shoved into me. I prefer the beatings, as they hurt
less. The objects they would shove into me would either be too large for the
orifice they chose, usually my anus, or either hot from fire or have sharp
barbs. I learned quickly not to complain. But, even when I do not complain,
they do these things.
When I passed my eighteenth winter, they began to tie me
to a bed and have each of the gloodishii rape me and ejaculate into me,
trying to breed my lineage into their line. I can only thank one of the chelata,
as she put an herb in my food that kept me from becoming pregnant. The result
of that, however, is that the men became more abusive with their rapes.
This go on for another four winters. Until a couple of
week ago. While cleaning one of the chelata, one of the soldiers that
guard me pinned me and tried to rape me in the anus. The chelata, who I
was friend with, threw him off of me. Before he could get up, I grab his sword
and stab him over and over. By the time I finish, more guard come in and shove
me away.
They proceed to beat me on spot, using the flat of sword,
rope, lash. My friend scream at them, but they ignore her. She scream for them
to stop, but they do not stop. The last I remember, one of the guard stand me
up while another hit my face with the handle of his sword.
I wake up to Alakath standing over me. He carry me into
this town, he call it Maidenhelm. He take me to doctors, who bandage and use
string to close my wounds. Alakath then give me nice food and clothes. He get
Johavarin to teach me his language.
I meet Amaka. Sweet girl, but I think she wants Alakath to
be hers. She help Alakath find information on bad men in town. She go with me
and Alakath’s bad friend, Berith. He supposed to take us to his brother, but
instead he attempt to sell us to someone. That fail only because of dog friend,
Gladia.
Gladia is nice. She new to us, but already just as worry
about Amaka as I. She strong, too. Carry Amaka many miles apparently. Amaka
look like she weighs much. She looks like someone who fights a lot. Many scars
I can see. She is sad a lot, now. Her brother died a few days ago when we find
her.
Now, I stay with Johavarin while Alakath’s house is
rebuild. Alakath stays here, too, although he gone more than not. He now doing
something with someone named Heather. Johavarin calls it squiring. He says it
is a good thing for the girl. Brings her much honor.
When I rebirth my clan, I want Alakath to be my Kruum.
He and Johavarin are the only two men here who have help me. Johavarin is too
old, so it must be Alakath. When that time come, he will be mine, no matter
what I have to do to make it so.
